The Unbearable Awesomeness Of Being

Friday, November 26, 2004

I Shot The Sheriff

Have you heard of JFK Reloaded? Of course you have. At this moment, only trichordates and foreigners have not heard about the game that destroys everything that America stands for by allowing you, as Lee Harvey Oswald, to shoot at Kennedy's digital noggin.

Personally, I'm impressed. Most people don't think of videogame as art, but it's certainly capable of messing with emotions and causing controversy as the best art can do. Escatologists, rejoice: The human moral can still be jabbed painfully, you just need 3D Studio. Nobody batted an eyelid at the Osama Bin Laden or Hitler-killing games, because they're obvious and patent archetypes of Evil. Kennedy is a symbol of Good, and attacking him means you are attacking all that is Good by proxy.

Why people are being so vitriolic at JFK Reloaded? It's a Stair Dismount with a president's face on the doll. It offers a prize for hitting the bullseye. I theorize it's because it jabs at one of the most complex and brittle axioms of human thought: That imagining doing something, and actually doing that thing, are unrelated things. State and religion across the ages has tried to restrain thoughts in order to restrain actions, and there's the ever present fear that putting an idea in a person's head might make them act on it. Doctrination, the game humanity has played upon itself since it decided a straight bipedal stance would help with the ladies.

In conclusion: 2005, WTC Reloaded. It's just a simulation.


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